25 Days of Jessmas Day 12: Minnesota & MIssissippi

On the 12th day of Jessmas, my Google-Fu sang to me:

Minnesota:

"Christmas Card From a Hooker in Minneapolis" by: Tom Waits

Oh, Tom Waits, you sure are something.  I guess this isn't really a Christmas song, despite the title, and it might win my award for most depressing song on the list.  The song is a letter to "Charlie" from (you guessed it) a hooker in Minneapolis.  She writes how she's pregnant, and it is inferred that it's Charlie's baby.  But she's engaged to a really nice man who loves her despite the fact that it isn't his baby.  The hooker has given up hooking and drugs and is really happy.  No, just kidding, at the end of the song she reveals that -spoilers- she's in prison and needs money for a lawyer so she can get parole.
Waits' smokey bluesy sound is something I like despite this song not really being about Christmas and being a big downer.  Maybe I'm just in a weird mood today.

2.5 out of 5 Whatever this thing is

"The Sons of Knute Christmas Dance and Dinner" by: Garrison Keillor

I imagine if you are a huge fan of A Prairie Home Companion and/or Garrison Keillor, you probably think this song is hilarious.  I saw the movie many years ago and enjoyed it well enough, but didn't realize until after that it was based on actual radio plays.  I found this song kind of funny, but I've never spent time in Minnesota or had many friends from that area (at least none that reminded me of the stereotypes.)  Also this song is less about Christmas, and more about a 4+ minute long joke about everyone having similar names and singing in exaggerated accents.  It was fine, it's just not a song I want to listen to more than once.

2 out of 5 Lake Wobegones

"Christmas in Minneapolis" by: Waterbury Studios

This jaunty tune is a modern take on the classic studio albums of yore when the studios would get their most popular bands/singers together to do a big jolly holiday number.  Unfortunately, I don't know who any of these singers are, plus I think they missed the mark on making a new holiday classic.  The song just feels generic and it's upbeat, but not all that catchy.  Meh.

1 out of 5 Princes (RIP)

Mississippi:

"Down Home Christmas" by: The Williams Brothers & The Canton Spirituals

This song isn't really my cup of tea, but I can appreciate it.  It's a catchy bluesy southern song about growing up pretty poor in Mississippi.  But, they sing about the importance of love and family which is nice.  Not my favorite song, but I liked the message.

3 out of 5 Magnolias (Mississippi is "The Magnolia Stat, FYI)

"Mississippi Christmas Eve" by: Charlie Daniels Band

If you're like me, the only Charlie Daniels Band song you know is "The Devil Went Down to Georgia" and unfortunately, you probably know ever word to that damnable song. (See what I did there?)
Well, this song isn't much better, but it is less likely to get stuck in your head all day.  It's just generic "good ol' boy" country music, and I didn't like it.

1 out of 5 Fiddle-Playing Robot Devils