It's My Nightmare (UPDATED...lots)

You guys know I have a totally healthy fear of birds.  Well the creepiest of creepy New York birds, the Mourning Dove, has decided it likes my bedroom window sill.

See, it's waiting for you to die so it can "mourn" you with it's dead soulless eyes.

I woke up one morning last week to the sound of what I thought was an owl. I immediately freaked out. Of all the birds that scare me, owls are the most terrifying.  (And the most terrifying of owls is the Barn Owl.)

Source

Seriously. Look at that shit. It's the thing that births nightmares.

I jumped out of bed and went to the window. I couldn't see any critters, but I could hear the incessant cooing/hooting. I went to the kitchen where Boyfriend was up and making his breakfast. I asked him if he was hearing what I was hearing or if I had finally gone completely mad. He said he was definitely hearing an owl. We looked out of every window but couldn't see anything. Boyfriend determined it was on the roof and went back to what he was doing. I refused to give up that easily. Finally, I spotted them. They were not owls, but a pair of Mourning Doves. Scary Mourning Doves. They were hanging out on our bedroom window sill. I went to the window and banged on the A/C unit and the window until they flew away. Unfortunately, they've been back every day since. It's my nightmare.


UPDATE: 3/19/13
They built a nest, you guys. Shit.

Now that the birds have built a nest, they're going to lay eggs. Nooooo! Now I can't scare them off, but I also can't scrape the nest away because my fear of birds is now battling my inner respect and love for living creatures. I'm the weirdest Druid ever, you guys.

UPDATE: 3/26/13
The nest is empty. It's a PAX East miracle. But now I feel sort of sad. What happened to the birdies? Did some tragedy befall them? Did squirrels attack?  Did it get too cold for them? I'm equal parts relieved and melancholy about it. Hmmm.

Weirdest. Druid. Ever.

Seriously.

UPDATE: 4/1/13

It's baaaaaaaaaaaack.  It's back and it's LOOKING AT ME!!!!

Worst. April Fool's Day. Ever.

UPDATE: 4/10/13 

Ok, now I'm really really torn. We're having a pretty big thunderstorm tonight, so I peeked out the window to check on the bird. It's gone and so is the nest. 
Now I'm really kind of sad, because It was all vibrating and stuff yesterday like it was laying an egg. I wasn't excited about having to wake up every morning to the sound of terrifying (and slightly ugly) peeping baby birds, but I feel sad that the storm blew away the nest or scared off the bird. I'm concerned about it.
And yet I fear it.

Seriously, just revoke my Druid card now. 

UPDATE: 4/11/13 (Last update, I swear)

If you follow me on Twitter, you will know that you can disregard that last update. I discovered that the bird and nest were perfectly fine and intact on the window sill after I  peeked out of our window this morning. Boyfriend and I were up very early to attend a friend's out-of-state graduation ceremony, which actually turned out to not be until NEXT week (of course we didn't learn this until after we'd already driven the 175 miles to get there, but I digress.) 

But the bird is ok. Yay.

Let the conflicted feelings continue...