Thursday, December 22, 2011

Epic Boyfriend

It's official: I have the greatest boyfriend ever!

Boyfriend and I are going down to No
rth Carolina with his family for Christmas-at-the-beach. To avoid carrying too much stuff down with us, we exchanged Christmas presents a couple of days early. I got him a nice leather-bound collector's edition of 2 Neil Gaiman books, a new laptop lap-desk, and some other fun odd n' ends. (My presents are a little lame in retrospect.)

Usually Boyfriend gives me jewelry for Christmas which is nice, it makes me feel pretty (and what girl doesn't enjoy feeling pretty?) So, when I saw just a small-ish rectangular box under the tree, I was intrigued. He talked abou
t how cool it was and hinted that it was really nice and that I was going to be surprised; I took that as a challenge to guess what it was. Try as I might, I hadn't a clue what was inside. The box was far too big and heavy to be jewelry, unless he had stolen me the crown jewels, but when would he have had the time to fly across the pond? The tag on the box read, "To my beautiful girl gamer" and it was too big and not the correct shape to be just a PS3 or XBOX game. What was in the box?!

A new XBOX controller for my tiny hands, perhaps? Or a new video game with a rock inside just to throw me off? Or SEVERAL new video games with a rock inside just to throw me off? The possibilities were endless...


The Anniversary Edition Zelda 3DS!!!!

I was completely blown away! I was in a state of shock when I opened the wrapping paper and saw the box. For a moment my brain could not seem to compute what it was. I was that surprised. I believe the exchange between me and my beloved went a little like this:

Me: Is it a 3DS?
Boyfriend: Yeah.
Me: REALLY?!
Boyfriend: Yep.
Me: YOU GOT ME A 3DS?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?! (at this point I was squealing at a frequency only dogs could hear)
Boyfriend: Uh-huh.
Me: OMAGOSHTHANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!

We had seen the 3DS debut at Pax East in March and had talked about how it would be fun to have, but we both agreed that we were satisfied with our PS3 and our XBOX360 among our other aging-yet-equally-loved-consoles. So, to say that I was confused and excited at the same time after opening my present is an understatement.

Now we can play video games together without playing together. One of us can play on one of the large consoles while the other plays the 3DS. Togetherness while we each do our own thing is an important part of what makes our relationship so awesome, especially when living in a big city with small living spaces; it's easy to get sick of people all up in your personal atmosphere. But, somehow we never get sick of each other...or at least if he gets sick of me, he's smart enough to never tell me.

I love my Christmas presents from him every year, but this year Boyfriend's gift will go down in the history books of awesome gifts (I don't know how he'll top it next year). Needless to say, he has gained the level of Epic Boyfriend.


Roll your fortitude, bitch!

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Scary Elevator of Doom or Mom, Don't Read This One

Anyone who knows me pretty well knows that I have some odd phobias. I'm afraid of birds, mostly pigeons, but any type of bird can make me flinch. I have an uncomfortable-ness with trains. I also hate crowds/strange people touching me, to the point where I will avoid them if at all possible. I am also claustrophobic to the point that the movie Devil scared the daylights out of me simply because it took place in an elevator, not by any horror-making "genius" of M. Night Shyamalan or the makers of the flick.
So with all these fears, one may ask why I chose to live in NYC...well that's another story.

This story, as you make have alreay guessed by the title is about my clausterphobia meeting my dislike of elevators. I work in Manahattan in a building (which will remain nameless/address-less to protect my co-workers' privacy and my job) with about 17 floors. This building has elevators, as do most buildings in Manhattan with more than 4 floors. Also, like many buildings in Manhattan, my building is quite old (pre-WWII), as are the elevators in it. I've always noticed that the elevators in my building seemed small for a building so tall with so many employees, but I guess elevators were smaller in the 1930's. I've also noticed that the elevators in my building seemed a little "shuddery" when going up the shaft (heh heh). I always tried to just shrug these off as "quirks" in the building and just dealt with the minute of uncomfortableness that would begin and end each of my work days. That is, until December 12th.


December 12th, 2011, around 9AM, my co-corker (for privacy, we'll call her Candy) and I had already arrived at work and gotten settled at our desks for what would probably be a quiet work day. Then we both decided we wanted a snack. My office doesn't have a snack machine, but there is a resonably-priced bodega in the lobby of our building, so we decided to go grab some goodies. The elevator ride down was without incident. We grabbed some snackies and got back into the 6th elevator car to return to the 9th floor. There were 2 other people in the car with us, both got out on the 6th floor. Then things got disturbing. The elevator moved upwards to the 7th floor, then to the 8th floor. The elevator car then shuddered violently and paused for 10 seconds. Candy and I looked at each other with mild concern. I pushed the alarm button, but it made no sound. The elevator car dropped suddenly and violently. Maybe it fell 2 feet or maybe it fell 10 feet, I can't say for sure, but I do know that elevators that are not labeled Twilight Zone Tower of Terror are NOT supposed to fucking do that!


I had never felt such suffocating fear in my life. The elevator lurched up and down several more times, Candy wimpered and squeezed my arm, I frantically pushed the alarm button and tried to remember how to breathe again. The elevator finally shuddered to a stop after skipping our floor on the 10th floor of our building. We both practically fell out of the elevator with relief and nearly in tears. We scrambled into the unknown office on the 10th floor and begged and pleaded with their receptionist to allow us access to use their stairs to go down one flight, because all be damned, we we not getting back in that elevator. Her response: "We don't allow access to the stairs for security reasons. Sorry." (She clearly did not realize that to get into the elevator and up to the 10th floor in the first place we had to go past building security). Both of us shaking like poodles in the winter, we begrudgingly got into a different elevator car to ride down one level.


Upon exiting into our office I stormed up to our receptionist and frantically asked her to call building management about an elevator incident.

Later that day, when leaving my building, I checked with the security man at the front desk to inquire if my complaint had been logged. When I asked about it, he looked at me like a deer in headlights. He had no idea what I was talking about. Awesome. Good job on those communication skills building management. I reiterated my complaint to the security guard.

Two days later THIS happened. (Note: for those who may be sensitive like me DO NOT read this article I linked to. It's sad and horrifying. You've been warned.) Two days after the Madison Ave elevator accident, I discovered that the elevator company in charge of maintainence in that building is also the company that does maintainence in MY building, as well as most elevators in Manhattan. Fucking fabulous. I promptly filed a complaint with the BBB about my building management (who had yet to follow up with me about the 2 complaints I had made about the elevator).

To say the least, I have been living in fear of elevators-all elevators-since. The daily anxiety is overwhelming in itself, but then to add on top of that the fear of dying everytime I need to go somewhere, this is no way to live.

Update: 1/3/12-Tip of the day: I always heard people joking about the BBB growing up, but damn, they mean business! You want something solved (especially a safety concern) you send those guys an e-mail! The office building manager called me the other day to apologize for the way things were handled. She also assured me that safety is their top concern, blah, blah, blah. Some other bullshit about who their independent inspector says that sometimes the elevators "jump" because they are old and leveling out. (WTF?! Seriously? I'm not 10, and I don't believe in Santa Clause so why are you selling me this bat shit?) Whatever. Point is, I scared them enough to call me. It made me feel like I got some power back.

Update: 3/1/12-I'm still extremely nervous about all elevators. The elevators in my building, especially, still scare the crap out of me. Thankfully, there have been no more "jumping" incidents.

Boyfriend and I actually went to Disney World in January and he coaxed me into going on the Tower of Terror. I didn't love the idea, but I was hoping that if I rode it, it would cure my phobia.

Nope.

Monday, December 19, 2011

H2$ And a Dance Down Memory Lane (Yet Another Nerdy Review) ~UPDATED~

I don't know if I've mentioned it yet, but in addition to being interested in "traditionally nerdy" stuff (cosplay, comics, sci-fi, D&D, video games, etc) I'm also a theatre geek. I did theatre and choir in high school (yet more reasons to be ostracized as a teen, yippee) so performance/entertainment are probably my first loves. I have the likes of Shari Lewis, Rob Paulsen, Penn & Teller, and TV shows like All That! to thank for having a huge influence on me and my wanting to be a performer.

My fabulous Boyfriend surprised me with an early Christmas present: tickets to see How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying on Friday night! We had such a fun time. I really wanted to see this show for a couple of reasons; I was in H2$ once upon a time in high school, so I have a fondness for the show-it was one of the first musicals I was in. Also, I love me some Daniel Radcliffe (um, hellooo? Who doesn't?!?!?!)

I was unable to see him the last time he was on Broadway in Equus, which received impressive reviews, had amazing puppetry, and featured a stellar cast (plus the added bonus of Harry Potter's, ahem, "wand" on display for the better part of the show for the ladies out there).

H2$ follows the young and eager J. Pierrpont Finch as he attempts to climb the corporate ladder using the advice in a little book: How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying (the book is narrated by the smooth vocal stylings of one dreamboat Anderson Cooper).


Considering DanRad (yes, that is what I'm calling him from now on) had no musical theatre training before this, he held his own on stage. His vocals stretch a little thin at times, and he sings a little nasally on the high notes, but he more than makes up for it with his comedic timing, and the boyish charm he brings to the otherwise underhanded smarmy fellow that Finch can be in his career-driven pursuits. His on-stage chemistry with John Larroquette (from Night Court...anyone? Damn I'm old) is so fun, and it is clear the two have a great working relationship. DanRad is also an impressive dancer considering his lack of training. While his form is not always as perfect as someone who has been dancing for decades, he brings an infectious energy and it is obvious he puts tremendous effort into his craft-an admirable feat. Granted, his super-stardom doesn't hurt him either, but I am amazed at how even after a year in this show, he still has such energy and focus amidst the (many, many, MANY) screaming fans in the audience each night.

Seeing the show Friday brought back a few fond memories from high school (and how few they were). While watching some of the choreography in the show and then later while listening to the soundtrack on the train on my iPod, I even started to remember my old choreography from 12 years ago. It's funny how the brain and muscle memories work, isn't it? Then I started trying to remember the names of my original cast in high school and started playing "where are they now?" in my head. The fellow who played Finch in my high school production, is now a local news reporter in Washington D.C. The guy who played J.B Bigley is now a director at the Atlantic Theatre Company here in NYC. Our Bud Frump now works in public television. Our Hedy La Rue is an actress/dancer in L.A. Our hilarious Wally Womper is now a seemingly jack-of-all-trades in the theatre and production world based in Chicago. Our Smitty now works as a student coordinator at the University of Colorado in Boulder. And last, but not least, our lovely Rosemary is now traveling the world and singing as she goes (or so I gathered from her vague FB page). Ok, enough stalking for now. I feel creepy.

Oh, and me? Now you know me as GurlNxtDoor (or Jess). In high school H2$, I was a lowly little secretary in a white button-up shirt and a ridiculously 60's-chic bright orangy/salmon-colored skirt.
And I was not a toy.

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Pardon Me While I Take a Stand...

I've censored the following, in protest of a bill that gives any corporation and the US government the power to censor the internet--a bill that could pass THIS WEEK. To see the uncensored text, and to stop internet censorship, visit: http://americancensorship.org/posts/15442/uncensor




█████ ████ did ███████ of ██████ ██████ ████ ████?




Uncensor This



Tell Congress to leave our rights alone!

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Do You Ever Have One of Those Days...?

...when you just want to throw your hands in the air, stomp around and say,
"Fuck this shit!"
Well, today might have been one of those days...